I was once told that every university has a different set of guys. Well this university is the same way, we have such interesting men, both the good and the bad. I would like to give a list of them. (of course with different names… just in case).
Earl Pitt: A tall, brown haired, brown eyed man. Sometimes viewed as the “campus stalker.” This guy is very friendly and he is into drama and all that stuff. He is loud and laughs more at his own jokes then anyone would at them. He thinks he is the hot shot on campus and struts around with girls thinking he is “all that” When he likes you he wont stop until you put a restraining order on him. Though, he believes he is at no fault because as I said… He is all that and then some. He will give you advice on guys that anyone else would never give, but if it works for him with girls then hey! It works for everyone.
Tommy Hillfigure: The campus dream. Business major. Knows exactly where he is going in life. Has a smile that will light up the world, and is clean cut and always smelling fresh. He sits behind you in chapel, and as you sit there, you are always making sure all your best angles are showing. Just in case he happens to glance your way with those crystal blue eyes… However, he is taken… (aren’t they all?) but that doesn’t stop you from crushing on him anyway.
Buck Brawly: Commonly referred to as the “lumberjack” or “woodsman” because he is always wearing plaid and is continually telling you about his latest adventures with bears and snakes and what not. This man has done EVERYTHING, and been everywhere. This man can make his own rope and eat cold soup straight from the can. He always smells likes pines and is clean cut and pretty much sexy with muscles that can do anything. Every girl’s dream AND single. Has a laugh that bellows from deep within and has different types of laughs so as to make everyone laugh with the randomness of them.
Lewis Jerry: The class clown, blond hair, blue eyes. Former athlete. Makes everyone laugh and keeps the party going when it dies. leave it to this guy to make you feel better when your heart is sad. will never leave you or treat you bad, he will always treat you with the respect you deserve and will always be loyal to you. Seems like you are the only girl he pays attention to… until you see his friend list and realize every girl likes the “funny” guy. He has his pick of the women here, but never chooses one because he is not ready to commit to anyone just yet.
Henry Bookworm: This man is tall and mysterious. But his head is always behind a book. He spends most of his time in the library, and is devoted and married to school work. Single. He has muscles that no bookworm should have and he is running marathons as a hobby, definitely in-shape. When he gets to talking, you find out that he is very funny and social. But occasionally doesn’t know when his jokes become a serious matter. Pushes the limit most of the time.
Tim Tubbs: This guys is tall and round. He is funny and nice and makes for a great friend. Stays with the same set of friends since middle school and is always finding ways to make someone smile. He is reserved and always sits on the couch watching TV. Would never want to play football. But would jump at the chance to play chess. Works at a super center working with the cameras… and loves it, but gets lonely so he invites everyone to visit him. Loves to explain and rate movies and values his hair, which curls around his baby face.
Derek Dreamer: Tall, single, marketing major. Smart as ever, but CLUELESS when it comes to women. Never gets a girl friend because he does not know how to treat one, and when it comes to dating he is never “ready” Mostly just nerves though. He will tease you like crazy and sometimes goes too far and does not know when to stop. When you accuse him of something he just blankly stares into the darkened abyss. He is the one who is not an ounce bit shy, but may come across as “awkward” however, you need him to break the ice in social settings.
Sam Rocketer: the engineer. Very smart and sounds like a talking dictionary. If you ever have a question he is sure to have the answer. Always jumps into all types of conversations with his opinions and thoughts. Will start political debates just by saying the word, “government” Always out to test the law of physics by doing random experiments in the lounge kitchen. Only owns one sweater and one pair of cargo pants, but they are always clean every day. This one is single too, but most girls don’t go for the “homeschool” look. Though this man is very attractive.
Rico Smooth: This smooth talker is tall with Latin flare. Exotic and very easy to get along with. Knows how to treat a woman good. Always up to date on compliments and is always surrounded by women. Flirts like crazy and sometimes looks way below the eyes. Always up to do something wild and crazy, anything to get the juices pumping. Smooth talker as well as smooth dancer. Will take you on an adventure on the dance floor. But amidst all his perfections he has an ego the size of China! Tends to act too macho, and will get jealous with rage, then threaten to beat up the guy who glanced your way. He expects to be treated as well as he treats you. and of course single.
-J.M.
